Sisters' Lectures
Just The Little You Need To Know
Backstage*
Staff: We’re ready to air.
Wacky: Who took my mask!? I’ve been searching for hours!
Staff: Wacky, it’s-
Wacky: What? Who took it? Come on, there’s no time for pranks!
Staff: It’s on your face.
Wacky: ……Oh.
Live*
Salam to whoever is on the other side of the screen (brother, sister, bibi, janab, hazrat, sayyed, you basically). No long intros, no unnecessary pleasantries. Let’s cut to the chase.
Dramatic Drumrolls
Introducing, SISTER’S LECTURES BY MAHDI MODARESSI.
Just a quick summary on what the lectures are about. As the name of the name suggests, they’re for the women and their empowerment. Letting them know that they’re not alone in this fight against the dunya and……other women, I don’t know, basically, just go on and read.
Let’s move on.
There are a total of 26 levels (as you might already know), that are specially designed (or maybe randomly assigned) to go from beginner to pro/advance/champ?/MVP?/blah blah.
Ready player, Guest?
Their Way Or The High Way
Live*
Salam to whoever is on the other side of the screen (brother, sister, bibi, janab, hazrat, sayyed, you basically). Let’s dive right into our first level.
LEVEL 1: Their Way Or The High Way.
It’s a trend nowadays, isn’t it?
backstage*
(Staff:……)
(Manager: What is?)
Oh, I didn’t say that, did I? Silly me.
Being detached from people. Not caring about people. We’re fiercely independent. We don’t need others.
I remember a friend of mine telling me about his grandfather’s father. Apparently, he was a man of pride. Earned well, provided for his family, and enjoyed high status in society. Yet, everyone saw his end coming from a mile away.
His ego.
So high, he stopped caring about people. He started to stay away from his own family half the time, never interacting with anyone, thinking he was too good for everything. In the end, he went insane.
Well, these were not his (my friend’s) exact words, but something along those lines. His great-grandfather lost it.
All that wealth and status didn’t help him one bit and he died alone, with no one by his side.
This was quite a generic story, but there’s a reason some things are generic in the first place. That’s because humanity proves time after time, how the moral of the story isn’t the focus for us, but the drama is.
My friend also continued how his grandfather spoke about his father when remembering him. His father wasn’t always like that, of course. It was a series of missed opportunities to set things right.
Unsaid words.
Tossed-aside feelings.
Until the opposite became true. Until the absence of love for their father, seemed more sensible.
Basically, even though we’re not supposed to get overly attached to people, people are everywhere and it’s in the nature of the intelligent creatures, to be drawn towards them.
ULTIMATE is the cheatsheet.
- Are you really me?
Let’s begin. *Dramatic drumrolls*.
Number 1, Are You Really Me?
The other day, my friends and I, sitting near the ocean, were discussing about boys.
(Manager: Oh?) *With a smirk, by the way*.
Wait. That came out wrong.
(Staff 1: Oh?)
You too? *Sigh* Listen to me.
(Manager: Why were you girls, giggling and discussing boys, huh?)
One, What are you? My dad?
Two, I never said we were giggling.
And three, stop talking like that.
(Manager: Like what?) *Eyebrows jumping. Eyes narrowed. Smile getting wider.*
Anyway. We were discussing boys, BECAUSE, my friend’s mom had suggested a guy for her (my friend). And we were basically criticizing and judging the guy to see if he was worth and deserving for my dear friend.
At some point, I remembered that I know someone who is a friend of this guy. Let’s name them, shall we? My friend is Hehe. Her potential future spouse is Nahnah. And the person I know, who is a friend of Nahnah, is Nuhuh.
(Staff 2: What she thinks of both the guys is quite obvious.)
(Staff 1: At least she’s using normal naming schemes.)
Now, I tell them what I vaguely know of Nuhuh, and immediately we’re on the same page. Company matters. If Nahnah is a friend of Nuhuh, then we can figure out how Nahnah is, because he hangs out with, or rather, is a friend of Nuhuh.
And Nuhuh is absolutely pa- is not our type.
Hence, Nahnah is also not my friend’s type.
This is a perfect example of the saying MM (Mahdi Modaressi) said in his lecture. It’s a tradition by Imam Ali (as) who is the Imam and leader of the Muslims after the Holy Prophet Muhammad (saws). Here’s the tradition:
“The soul is the most powerful thief.”
Quite self-explanatory, isn’t it? I went to a bachelorette party yesterday, and my friend (who was the star of the party) used some word I can’t quite recall. Her best friend (let’s call her BFF) commented that she had copied BFF’s style of talking.
After a moment of silence, my friend (the star of the whatever) murmured her agreements.
Hence proved. The more time you spend with someone, even without realizing it, you start becoming like them. Mirror them. The way they talk, the way they think, the way they are.
This shows just how vulnerable we really are. Now, it’s not always about friends.
It can be obsessions too.
We, even as intelligent creatures, gravitate towards other intelligent creatures like celebrities or the affluent. Why? Cause they have what we wish to. We admire someone for their voice and yearn to have that same melodious tone.
But it’s not only the voice at that point.
We’ve sunk so low when obsessing over someone else, thanks to this ‘soul-is-the-most-powerful-thief’ phenomenon, we want to copy their voice, their dressing style, how they carry themselves and everything in between.
We wish to be like them.
We become like them.
Abandoning our own self.
And so the question arises, Am I really Me?
And there, you just successfully completed LEVEL 1! Congratulations! Though only in theory. The practical exams are yet to commence. Start preparing, and apply these in your daily life. Lemme warn you, it’s not gonna be easy.
But who care about easy? The fact you tolerated this artic- *clears throat*.
Now, what’s next? The next level of course.
Share your progress in the comments or (look below)
Ready for LEVEL 2? Yes? Before proceeding, clean the books that have been neglected for too long.
Khudahafiz.
Your Hero Has Arrived
*Live*
Salam to whoever is on the other side of the screen (brother, sister, bibi, janab, hazrat, sayyed, you basically), a smile looks good on you than any Instagram or Snapchat filter. Let’s start with the second level.
LEVEL 2: Your Hero Has Arrived.
Another article started with a reel I watched sometime in my life.
*backstage
(Manager: Just proves that you’re addictively online.)
It doesn’t.
(Manager: What’s your screen time?)
So, yeah, the reel I watched was of a girl, probably in middle school. She was standing in front of the camera, cradling her belly. Gave us, the audience, a side view, trying to stress on the point that she’s gaining weight.
Again, she was in her early teens.
Gaining weight cause she was getting a bump.
A baby bump.
And that SHE was having a BABY with TODOROKI.
Guess who Todoroki is.
An anime character.
A 2D drawing with daddy issues and half-and-half hair.
(Manager: That’s the reason I told you to stop watching cartoons.)
Okay, one, it’s not cartoons, it’s anime. It is NOT for kids. And two, SHE should be watching cartoons indeed. Like Dora the explorer, and not Demon slayer.
Anyway, the point? People get so emotionally invested in media that they adopt fictional characters as their personal icons.
Cosplaying, edits, dramatic monologues—cool, whatever. But when you start losing your identity for it? I had a far-away cousin who used to be sweet and bubbly. The next time we met again, she was kinda the same, more maturish, but her style of talking had changed significantly.
Like, in every language, when you address yourself, there are different versions in that too. English doesn’t really have an example cause everyone uses I, like, “I did this and Imma obviously regret it for life.” But maybe, for explanation purposes, let’s see how people in the English language itself, have different ways of speaking.
“Wacky likes chocolates.”
Eugh. I just got goosebumps. When I say the above the sentence it’s addressing myself from the third person perspective.
So uwu, right?
Well, basically, this cousin started addressing herself like this but in the language we were conversing it.
Immediately I pieced it together as to who my cousin was trying to copy.
Cause I knew the source too.
Get it?
Shall we, move on?
ULTIMATE follows who?
- They’re like you but are they?
Let’s begin. *Dramatic drumrolls*.
Number 1, They’re Like You But Are They?
Honestly, it feels wrong to talk about anime and everything in an Islamic and religious article, but again, Islam addresses all aspects of life.
A complete religion.
That’s the reason it has given us our heroes instead of leaving us on our own vulnerable self. Us, who would chase shadows like a gullible cat. That 329 worded introduction above was detailed enough for us to connect the dots. The two examples, showcase how those two people have selected their heroes.
Why heroes?
Cause as MM said and we summarized in the first level, humans are drawn towards humans. And before we know it, all we want is to follow this hero we’ve selected for ourself, be with them and become like them.
Okay, not gonna lie, story time. We had a television long long back in my childhood and I used to watch all the local dramas. A total drama junkie. Then, boom no TV anymore and restrictions on the second-hand, broken screen mobile.
I feel that when children go through puberty, parents do too.
Like, they get extra strict on you when you feel life is extra strict already. And you’re in a phase where everything makes you raise your eyebrows and sigh. Or frown and breakdown.
So basically, after my mom finished with this phase and I was finally allowed to use the phone again, I started with the local dramas I used to watch.
Who needed TVs anyway.
This metal box was more than enough.
After this mini quarantine, it felt like dramas were my salvation. Then came this particular drama with the cast in the same age group as me. I started imagining them in my life. As my friends.
Such a loser, but anyway.
I started styling my hair like the female lead did. That too, in her behind-the-scenes life. Not the drama I had actually liked. Started watching everything related to them on social media. Plot twist? From my mom’s account. I didn’t have my own at that time.
Made up scenarios before sleeping.
To the point, I actually started feeling like I knew them. Personally.
Never am I going in that rabbit hole again.
(Host: How did you get out of that loser phase?)
He’s here again. Mr. Manager, you’re not doing your job.
(Manager: I kind of want to know the answer to that question too.)
*Sigh*.
I stopped watching that local crap. Switched to international. In a way, anime saved me.
(Host: How did you not fall low for anime like you did for these-)
As I said. Never am I going in that rabbit hole again.
(Host: That’s not really an ans-)
We DO NOT, talk about that dark arc.
When I look back at myself, I wanna bang my head against the wall in embarrassment. When I look at their social media now, I question my choices in life.
So now, the real point of this article. The role of other people, of heroes in our lives is quite obvious. And that’s the reason we have to make sure that we choose the right people.
And Islam has done that for us too.
The Ahlul Bayt.
The divinely selected leaders.
The infallibles.
Cause if they make mistakes, you’re gonna adopt those traits too.
That local drama boy? One of my first fictional crushes.
He had anger issues in the show. Suddenly, so did I.
Offline, he was into gymnastics. I almost taught myself how to do a front flip.
Front flip was fun.
Though now I might break my neck.
Anyway enough, this level’s going on for too long.
(Host: You actually needed me in this episode.)
I’ve told you before. I can host my own shows.
(Host: I can help.)
Exit stage left, buddy.
Bye.
And there, you just successfully completed LEVEL 2! Congratulations! Though only in theory. The practical exams are yet to commence. Start preparing, and apply these-yada yada yada.
Now, what’s next? The next level of course.
Share your progress in the comments or (look below).
Ready for LEVEL 3? Yes? Before proceeding, why not wink at Allah?
Khudahafiz.
Visibly Nuh Uh
Live*
Salam to whoever is on the other side of the screen (brother, sister, bibi, janab, hazrat, sayyed, you basically), did you wink at Allah? Good. Let’s start the third level.
LEVEL 3: Visibly Nuh Uh.
You know that famous image where two people are pointing at a number on the ground? One says it’s a 6, the other swears it’s a 9? Yeah. That one. It came to my mind when MM dropped a particular point that we’re about to dissect.
Even though it will sound similar at surface level, it is completely different than what we’re about to discuss today.
Oh also, if you don’t know what image I’m talking about, the staff, if y’all could please-
(Staff: We can’t, actually. Copyright issues.)
Why don’t we have a company artist yet?
(Staff: You keep rejecting each one.)
(Manager: That’s because she wants to do it. But she has art skills like a three year old’s with a red crayon.)
I’m just going to describe the image. Oh wait! I already did. Let’s move on.
ULTIMATE will fact-check:
- What he said.
- God ain’t like us.
Let’s begin. *Dramatic drumrolls*.
Number 1, What He Said.
Put aside the picture for a while and let’s discuss what MM said.
(Manager: Yeah, you’ve been building the mystery longer than Allah creating the world.)
Now, as we know, there were messengers or prophets sent in the past to guide our ignorant ass- ahem I mean us. We were ignorant and vulnerable. Because, surprise surprise, humans were out here making God out of rocks and trees and literal sparkly stars. All due to the innate nature of a human.
And that is, there is someone greater. Someone actually there behind the stages of reproducing soil, giggling flowers, soothing oceans and the vast skies.
Someone behind the curtains.
So yeah, we needed divinely sent people to get us on the divine path.
Someone sent from above who knew more than us idol and star worshippers.
Someone familiar with the backstage.
Who could tell us the script.
Here’s the spicy part: Christianity and Judaism also believe in these prophets. However, they have a different view on them and their personalities.
As we discussed in the last level, it is quite clear now why our heroes or the people we follow, aka these prophets, have to be infallible and reliable and always correct and blah blah. However, people following the two above think quite the opposite.
The bible has absolutely grotesque stuff about the prophets. When MM asked one of the religious people who followed Christianity, he answered saying that it was because God wanted to teach us, ignorant and foolish, vulnerable human beings that it’s okay to be the worst person on the face of the earth while still being a luminary figure, bestowed with the role of guiding people to the divine path.
We’ll discuss more of this in later levels.
But yeah, this was the introduction.
Hooked, right?
Controversy is spicy like that.
Number 2, God Ain’t Like Us.
Now, talking a little about the introduction, we are basically saying that God, that is the most Supreme and Master of everything, the one who created us and all this stuff around us, did something absolutely foolish and illogical.
He sent prophets who were flawed? Imperfect? Maybe even morally questionable?
Once I was travelling in a foreign country. Using the overcrowded public transport is like a necessity and one of the things on the bucket list of every tourist.
We were in the train, right at the door. Our overconfident selves were sure we could survive without using the air-conditioned trains. Bad idea. We regretted every second as we held onto poles and prayers so that we weren’t thrown off onto the rails as the train zigzagged like a possessed rollercoaster.
We were late, tired, exhausted.
It couldn’t get worse.
It did though.
The train made it worse.
It stopped in the middle of nowhere. All around us were rails, electric poles, wires, buildings faraway and a few people fearlessly clicking pictures.
Now, two tracks away, another train pulls up and stops.
We’re face-to-face with strangers, so so awkward.
People standing there, holding onto dear lives like us, trying not to make eye contact. It happens though. Accidently.
Cue the unsure and doubtful moment where you’re considering if you’re supposed to smile or not and that weird moment where you do.
You smile. But they look away.
They realize and look back. Now you look away. In the process of turning, you grimace. as you realize that they’re looking at you now. But for some absurd reason, you can’t look at them now. And then-sigh.
What a nightmare.
It’s a mess. You debate your whole existence.
Social horror.
Getting to the point of this story. We were there, frozen in time. When I see a guy on the track approaching the train opposite us. How was he going to get in? There was a mini ladder under the entrance. I’ve seen them before but never actually noticed how they were used.
That was the first time I saw its need.
Live.
In action.
And then I thought to my philosophical self, well well well, everything has a reason to it. Every single thing has a reason behind its existence.
But you’re saying that the God that created people that created this mini ladder for strangers on the track, will send prophets to guide lost souls on the right path, while being imperfect and weak in character?
Make it make sense.
If I’m good at math hypothetically (I’m not) and not at geography (I’m not good at this either), it’s obvious that I can teach math (I can’t) and not geography (yeah, again, I can’t).
So how can a prophet, good at one thing and horrible at another guide all the types of humans? All types of people that might be good at the one thing that this supposed prophet is bad at? Then what right does this prophet have, that he can guide another human?
What disqualifies this human from being a prophet instead?
How can you be good and bad at the same time?
How can you be both divinely chosen and deeply flawed?
And how can a perfect God entrust his precious beings’ life to someone like that?
You tell me.
And there, you just successfully completed LEVEL 3! Congratulations! Though only in theory. The practical exams are yet to commence.
Start preparing, and apply these-yada yada yada.
Now, what’s next? The next level of course.
Share your progress in the comments or (look below)
Ready for LEVEL 4? Yes? Before proceeding, tell me how do you get rid of dark circles.
Khudahafiz.
Your Heart Needs Eyes
*Live*
Salam to whoever is on the other side of the screen (brother, sister, bibi, janab, hazrat, sayyed, subscriber #209, yes, you basically), here’s a question: who said sweets are only for Eid? Exactly. Let’s get to Level 4.
LEVEL 4: Your Heart Needs Eyes.
backstage*
(Manager: You didn’t talk about the image at all.)
Right. The image.
Well, this well-known illustration, perfectly illustrates how people have different answers and beliefs. But that is because, in this particular situation, there’s a difference in perspective. The way you see things. The way you take things.
But here’s the glitch: Not everything, is perspective-based. That’s why the term ‘common sense’ came into existence. It’s true that people’s common sense won’t always match, but that just proves that that is not common sense.
*Sigh*
In conclusion, this image had no role, or rather a very puny role to play in this article.
(Manager: No, I think it was good.)
(Host: Same here.)
You, are not getting to host my show.
(Manager: I was sincere.)
I heard about the report you messe-
(Manager: You were going to talk about the bi-)
SHH.
NO SPOILERS.
Yes, common sense. Logical things. It’s common sense that you’re not supposed to follow things that make no sense.
ULTIMATE can help you.
- All about the….you know….that book.
Let’s begin. *Dramatic drumrolls.*
Number 1, All About The…..You Know….That Book.
And now let’s talk about something that proves people follow something that is not on the same wavelength of common sense. That is, not to attack, but to present facts, the bible.
Hear me out, and then I’ll welcome all your reactions.
We spoke about how according to particular religions, the leaders, messengers or the prophets that are sent to guide mankind are actually sinners themselves.
And that it’s okay for the guides to be fallible and make mistakes just like us normies. But then how are they better than us and what right do they have over us. Why should we listen to them? What makes them better than the average tax-paying cousin?
This isn’t judgment. This is questioning the structure.
Anyway.
Moving on, here comes a spicy example, brought to you by MM (who, yes, studied Christianity in depth): The contradictions between the prevalent beliefs and historically written proof in the bible.
Belief: Jesus was crucified so as to pay for the sins of mankind.
Written: He asked for spoilt vinegar (what even is that) cause he was in a lot of pain.
So did he did not do whatever he did, voluntarily? If he chose the pain, why try to escape it?
And whatever does salvation for mankind even mean?
He did it for the people so that they could conveniently shirk responsibility?
If that was the case, I’ll do the hell I want, cause someone else is gonna take the fall for it anyway.
Where does accounting come in then? Good deeds, bad deeds, heaven and hell, who goes where? How does it all piece out?
Let’s talk about another prophet and his aw boo-boo slip-up.
In the next level, that is.
And there, you just successfully completed LEVEL 4! Congratulations! Though only in theory. The practical test is life itself. All the best.
Now, what’s next? The next level of course.
Share your progress in the comments or (look below)
Ready for LEVEL 5? Yes? Before proceeding, smile at your mother. Don’t be creepy though.
Khudahafiz.
You’re Saying it Yourself
Live*
Salam to whoever is on the other side of the screen (brother, sister, bibi, janab, hazrat, sayyed, you basically), I thought you should know, I broke my chair. Anyway, let’s fall headfirst into our fifth level.
LEVEL 5: You’re Saying It Yourself.
I’m not going to go very deep into details, but the two major sects of Islam, as you might know, are Shias and Sunnis.
Now, the core difference between the two is who they follow as their leader after the Holy Prophet (saws). Also, by the way, just to get this clear, Islam considers the prophets and messengers as infallible.
They can’t make mistakes.
Of course, they can’t.
That’s bulls-
backstage*
(Manager: AHHH- NO NO NO!)
My bad. But imagine this. The Quran has told us not to drink alcohol. And the prophet preaching this to me, is sipping whiskey at the town square. Make. It. Make. Sense.
Yes, back to business. The two sects, two leaders. According to Shias, it is Imam Ali (as) and according to the latter it is, Abu Bakr.
Now, if we were to sum up the above levels, we’ve already established that humans don’t have the qualifications to appoint divine leaders. We’re confused, biased, emotional. It has to be someone divinely appointed. Someone who has divine knowledge. Someone who won’t do something that he’s telling me not to.
I read this somewhere and it fits so well: Someone who walks the walk—not just talks the talk.
History presents how right after the death of the Holy Prophet, there commenced a meeting with a few muslims at a place called Saqifa. This meeting was held to decide the so called ‘leader’ after the Holy Prophet.
Who was there? Abu Bakr.
Who wasn’t? Imam Ali (as).
Where was he (as)? With the Prophet.
Says a lot, doesn’t it?
ULTIMATE knows how:
- It’s gonna be story time, kids.
Let’s begin. *Dramatic drumrolls*.
Number 1, It’s Gonna Be Story Time, Kids.
The above was just an intro. Here’s what MM said from the book of Genesis. By the way, many of the Christians believe that the bible in this time, is not the one that was revealed to Jesus. Or the one that Jesus got.
Yeah, book of genesis.
Lemme shorten it.
Prophet Isaac – old and blind – wants to make his first son, Isao, his successor, the prophet – calls Isao – tells him to cook a meal after hunting goats – get it to him – P. Isaac will bless him and make him a prophet.
Rebecca, mama of second son – hears this – says “Nope. Not on my watch.” – goes to Jacob (second son) – tells him about all this and says that she wants him to become the prophet instead of Isao.
Jacob says “what if father finds out” – he’s not worried about deceiving his father – no no, he’s worried about getting caught – Rebecca darling says not to worry sweetie, mommy’s got this – tells him to get goat – he does – helps him make dish – goes to father.
Jacob comes and says father I got your dish, now bless me – Isaac asks who are you – of course, silly me, of course the guide of humanity doesn’t know the voice of his own son.
Says I’m Isao – *he lies * – father says lemme touch you – now, plot twist – Isao was hairy – Jacob wasn’t – dear father was going to find out.
Rebecca for the win.
She knew this would happen – she covered Jacob’s hand with goat skin – so now father touches goat skin and is convinced that Jacob is Isao – yup, guide of humanity goes “Yup, that’s my Isao.” – again, can’t tell difference between goat skin and human skin – blesses him – Jacob, is now a prophet.
Wohoo.
Real Isao back with perfectly grilled goat curry – tells father to bless him – P. Isaac shocked – says I just blessed you – utter confusion – truth out – Isao asks what about me now? – Father says you’re now a slave to Jacob – you’re gonna be miserable – this blunder happened and now Jacob is the prophet.
What does this indicate, ladies and gentlemen? Here, lemme summarize for you:
- You can steal someone else’s right.
- You can shamelessly lie on a person’s face.
- Goat skin is now identity theft.
- Greediness for power is absolutely fine.
- It’s okay to manipulate your blind dad.
Cool. Cool. Cool.
Whereas in Islam, Allah decides who the prophet, who the leader is. Sit down. No drama. No kitchen politics.
And it is quite clear without any goats and blessings.
And there, you just successfully completed LEVEL 5! Congratulations! Though only in theory. The practical exams are yet to commence. Start preparing, and apply these-yada yada yada.
Now, what’s next? The next level of course.
Share your progress in the comments or (look below)
Ready for LEVEL 6? Yes? Before proceeding, say khudahafiz to me too.
Khudahafiz.
Stand back, the read time’s being calculated…
Not Contradicting
Live*
Salam to whoever is on the other side of the screen (brother, sister, bibi, janab, hazrat, sayyed, you basically), I see you’re being consistent. I respect that. Let’s start with our sixth level.
LEVEL 6: Not Contradicting.
I once read a tweet about how if you need laws to be good, are you really good then? And it’s been stuck in my mind ever since then.
Won’t be giving y’all an intro or a detailed description or a trailer or a fancy montage or anything cause this is an extension, or rather, a continuation of the last level.
Let’s begin?
backstage*
(Manager: Are you asking for permission?)
We’re not doing this again.
(Manager: When did we do it before?)
In How To Talk To Anyone, level 15.
(Manger: No way.)
Yes way.
ULTIMATE can help:
- Something that makes sense.
Let’s begin. *Dramatic drumrolls*.
Number 1, Something That Makes Sense.
A Jewish someone (an expert or a follower, not sure) told MM that he thinks God is the one who’s responsible for all the bad and evil of this wretched world.
Well, technically, he’s not at fault.
I think I kinda see where he’s coming from.
Based on the religion he’s following, a God that sends thieves and liars and covetous individuals as prophets, as guides to humanity, might just be responsible for the outcome of the guidance.
The famous ayat in which Allah tells us to follow the purified ones, is the only solution to this nonsen-irrationality.
(Manager: She’s getting better at controlling her tongue.)
Nonsense.
(Manager: *Sigh*)
To back this up, the Holy Prophet’s well-known tradition about being on the right path after him is by following the Quran AND the Ahlul Bayt. The people of the house. The people of the Prophet’s house.
A mathematician also needs a teacher to explain the things written in a book.
And an English teacher can’t teach him numbers and fractions.
Man, fractions sounds so scary.
(Host: Can you stress on the analogy?)
*Wacky stares him down.*
You- I’ll deal with you later. The analogy is simple. An English teacher can’t teach formulas and a lying prophet can’t teach us to be truthful.
And that’s the reason you need someone who is perfect in every sense and aspect. Aka, the purified ones. Their debut happened in the most authentic and biggest stage ever, the Quran.
This is also an analogy, don’t get offended.
I know y’all won’t.
But my staff won’t let me continue till I get this formal sh-I mean, formal stuff done.
Talking about the Quran, Allah says to follow and stay on the right path.
Now tell me, how do you know what the right path is?
Who decides what the right path is?
Who draws the map?
Of course, God.
And then He sends righteous and pious people, who have complete knowledge about this right path, to lead us there too.
“Allah doesn’t only tell us to be truthful and pious but also gives us guides and examples to follow that are truthful and pious.”
MM said that.
MM was right.
And there, you just successfully completed LEVEL 6! Congratulations! Though only in theory. The practical exams are yet to commence. Start preparing, and apply these-yada yada yada.
Now, what’s next? The next level of course.
Wanna flex your progress? In the comments you go!
Ready for LEVEL 7? Yes? Before proceeding, stop wasting time on choosing which drama to watch.
Khudahafiz.
Stand back, the read time’s being calculated…
ASMR Is Overrated
Live*
Salam to whoever is on the other side of the screen (brother, sister, bibi, janab, hazrat, sayyed, you basically), the screen is quite dirty by the way. Anyway, let’s start with our seventh level.
LEVEL 7: ASMR Is Overrated.
The craze for these squeezing slimy stuff and compressing metal cans was the most trending thing back in the lockdown times. People used to watch anything and everything under the holy banner of Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response.
For the sake of this level, I checked out the recent ASMR videos and seems like we’ve evolved (a lot) in this field too. Not to hate anyone (I might on my unofficial account), but it definitely took me by surprise.
Gave me this nostalgic feeling that things were better in our times than whatever people do nowadays. But anyway, that’s not the point for today. The roundabout meaning behind today’s title, is that (what I think) satisfaction cannot be obtained from guaranteed videos and audios, commonly categorized under, ahem, ASMR.
I literally believed that this content was to give you a calm, relaxing and satisfied feeling. Turns out it’s for tingling, static-like, goosebump sensations.
Just like the meaning of ASMR, or rather, ASMR itself has drastically strayed away from its purpose over a span of time, let’s discuss similar downward spirals that we might be familiar with.
backstage*
(Manager: My kid watches those videos.)
Please take measures like a parent should.
ULTIMATE shows the truth:
- Silent and slow.
- Quite the contrary.
Let’s begin. *Dramatic drumrolls.*
Number 1, Silent And Slow.
There’s a reference and a double meaning behind everything. The crying emoji is used for laughing. The skull emoji specifies humor that is top-tier. And the nail polish emoji signifies materialism.
This soft war we’re battling against, makes us believe that material and money solves life problems. It does. And I’m not going to deny that. What it also does, is create more.
Create more problems.
When?
Only when we make them a condition for happiness and a survival competition to obtain more. I’d like to share this one-
(Manager: Isn’t she becoming politer day-by-day?)
(Staff: Right? She never asked so nicely before.)
You know I’m not actually asking, right?
(Host: Courtesy. That’s what they mean.)
I swear to God, why is he still here?
(Host: I thought you were going to consider-)
Shut. Lemme focus.
Where was I? Yes, share a reel I watched. What was it about? These damn idiotic shame on the name of humanity made me forg-
(Manager: She turned worse than before.)
(Staff: And whose fault is that?)
Aha! The reel had this question that kids are usually asked. ‘What would you like to be when you grow up?’ There were different roles popping up on the screen in random places with a half-second difference between them.
Engineer.
Doctor.
Designer.
Artist.
Whatever.
And then everything stopped. All the words vanished and one single word took the spotlight in the centre.
‘Unhurried’.
It said. For some reason, this goes perfectly when comparing with the love of this world. This world and everything in it has a smooth, silky blindfold over us. And when we realize it, it distracts us again by sometimes adding a better fragrance or tossing in glittery fakes.
So now, should we give up everything we supposedly ‘own’ and go live in the mountains? No. We appreciate stuff. We give it a moment and feel a little happy about it. That’s it.
If we don’t have it, it’s okay. We work for it. But not to the extent, where our motive of life becomes that. A goal is different. And motive, is way way different.
I’m actually talking to myself cause I don’t have a setup. And I’m literally on the gadgets all the time. Like, my studies and everything requires it but…..yes….won’t a curated desk setup with indoor plants and lights and anime figurines and all my stationery sorted, be an absolute bliss?
My bad, I got carried away. Islam says the less you’re attached to these things the more secure and comfortable you are. Let’s discuss that too, shall we? Only that this was all supposed to be in one point, but it’s not gonna fit….so……
Number 2.1, Silent And Slow, pt.2.
There. Does that not make the content easier to read?
Yes, comfortable and secure. And the easy access to other people’s live has snatched us of this very blessing. We’re not comfortable the way we are. We think that this way of life is just another day.
We scroll past ‘perfect’ lifestyles and decide our own is trash.
In a seminar I attended, they told us to write one thing we’re grateful about everyday, and honestly it changes you completely. Mr. Manager, you should definitely try this.
We see rich people’s apparent ‘way of living’ and think it’s the standard. The bare minimum to be able to wake up with a smile on our face.
Just shows how sick we are.
I mean, even if I don’t have a cool ahh table with cool ahh stuff, at least I have my own personalized corner with everything I need and the lack of coolness, that is apparently decoration and flashy stuff, can be easily compensated by how cool I am. It’s all innate. Right?
(Manager: …..)
(Staff: ……)
(Host: ……)
I don’t care what y’all think.
Let’s move on.
By standard of living I remembered a point from the lecture I’m currently listening to. People give up their beliefs and themselves to ‘fit in’ and be ‘accepted’. Where? In a society that jumps to attack one person to another as if a kangaroo had springs for legs and did his leg day religiously.
One such example that MM gave was Muslim influencers.
To be more precise, female Muslim influencers. Honestly the word influencers should be double quoted cause they’re honestly the ones being the most influenced. They follow every single trend.
I mean I see a joke and I like it. And my dear smart algorithm gives the same joke to me only by someone else performing it. Man, I thought it was exclusive.
Like the author created or something.
Maybe they did.
But the “influencers” got influenced and here we are.
So yes, the example. The female Muslim influencer starts with perfect hijab and conduct. And then social media makes her doubt her faith. She gets algorithm-peer-pressured. The reason she’s not happy, the reason more people don’t know her is all because of her beliefs.
So enter, make up.
Better yet, remove the hijab.
The one thing that was unique about her, gone.
It’s not her choice, it’s the comment section’s.
Number 2, Quite The Contrary.
Do this, do that, be this, be that….so that you can be happy and content. Satisfied.
Darling, don’t you get it?
“The only time we’re ever going to be satisfied, is when we’re buried deep under.” ~MM.
So the only way is to remember the above and make an effort to not get attached. As always, Islam being the complete religion that it is, has given us the way on how to lead a life as discussed.
Imam Husayn (as).
The prime example of being aloof from this world. Gave his life for the right cause knowing, that this world, indeed, is not worth it. His family, sons, uncles, companions, everyone would’ve been alive if he had paid allegiance to yazid. Yes, I’m not going to capitalize his (la)’s name.
Anyway, to prove this point further, we can also take the example of Bibi Zainab (sa) who saw everything dreadful unfold right before her eyes and yet, what did she say?
“I saw nothing but beauty.”
When you’re firm on the path of Islam. And you attach yourself to Allah and who He has commanded us to, everything becomes easier. This world’s tribulations seem minor. The insecurities vanish. The people and their opinions don’t matter. Who are they to decide whether you wear hijab or not?
This, gives you confidence.
Confidence to stand up to people who can’t keep to themselves and let others live.
The same confidence Bibi Zainab (Sa) had when she went into the court of yazid. Strong, bold, and confident. Cause she knew, Allah is there.
And Allah is right.
And the right always wins.
The signs are all there. yazid’s court is just a pile of dust and ruins. A nobody.
And Imam Husayn (as)? The fact that even non-Muslims use his (as)’s example speaks a lot.
ps: Hope you liked today’s article. ASMR has taken over my algorithm. I’m doomed.
And there, you just successfully completed LEVEL 7! Congratulations! Though only in theory. Practical exam starts whenever Instagram tries to sell you a personality and you shoo it away.
Now, what’s next? The next level of course.
Share your progress in the comments or (look below)
Ready for LEVEL 8? Yes? Before proceeding, tell me, do you like oranges?
Khudahafiz.
Stand back, the read time’s being calculated…
Thieves That Don’t Steal Hearts
Live*
Salam to whoever is on the other side of the screen (brother, sister, bibi, janab, hazrat, sayyed, you basically), you’re on the eighth already? Good job, I guess. You want a sticker?
LEVEL 8: Thieves That Don’t Steal Hearts.
This level is honestly just to make sure that the cement is now hard, that the glue is dry, and the point is now driven home.
Time to lock it in.
The point that we’ve been discussing in the last levels.
What have we been discussing, humans?
backstage*
(Manager: Common sense.)
(Staff: Selectively blind syndrome.)
(Host: That the host can host this show too.)
Your answers were pretty good, except the last one. Everything that was shed some light upon, had one thing in common.
People.
And their roles in our lives. Their fingerprints on our timeline.
And here we just strengthen the concept.
ULTIMATE is your friend, indeed.
- What do I do with my fam?
Let’s begin. *Dramatic drumrolls.*
Number 1, What Do I Do With My Fam?
I’m not even kidding, okay. I went to pray namaz a while back when thoughts obviously barged in, uninvited and disrespectful as ever, trying to make sure I can’t concentrate on what I’m praying.
I was thinking about the hangout yesterday. Was kinda being grateful for having friends like…..the friends I have basically.
So anyway, I was just pondering (for a little while, mind you. I focused back on the namaaz, I promise) how it feels like we’ve been friends for ages when in reality it’s been like two years.
How I know so much about them already when I never opened up so much even to my school friend who was in the same class as me for nearly six years.
And then for some weird reason, I thought, if we were in a mimic competition, how would I, imitate them? Immediately my brain replied with a downloaded file which contained, friend_no1.mp4, where I was talking with the same hand actions and head motions like her.
friend_no2.mp4, was me repeating a single word in this particular accent cause nowadays this particular friend has been saying that word a lot. I asked her about it yesterday. She told me it was some joke at her uni.
friend_no3.mp4, was just me saying that I’ll just laugh, cause that’s all this one friend does.
What I’m trying to say, is that….BOOM….isn’t it obvious? We talked about the soul being a thief already. Here’s your proof. I might’ve not adopted their actions yet, but the fact that I could think of something like this in an instant, is proof enough.
My soul, is already syncing these files.
MM says that people say oh, we’re just friends. Just colleagues. Nothing will happen. Anything, can happen, darling.
Okay, he didn’t say darling.
MM also stressed on the point of why selecting the people around you should be a careful and deliberate process. How can you make friends with anyone? With people who will harm you in one way or another. Maybe you think you’re firm on your religion and values and opinions and beliefs. But but but, the soul.
The Soul.
Would you do the same with your precious possessions? Would you give them to anybody and everybody? Then why not the same with yourself?
MM said that too.
But then, friends and co-workers are not the only one surrounding you.
Family.
What do we do about them?
Well, my mom taught me. We love them.
And there, you just successfully completed LEVEL 8! Congratulations! Though only in theory. The practical exams are yet to commence. Start preparing, and apply these-yada yada yada.
Now, what’s next? The next level of course. Keep your snacks ready!
Share your progress in the comments or (look below)
Ready for LEVEL 9? Yes? Before proceeding, I read that lollipops are so dumb. You flavor your spit and drink it.
I can’t be the only one suffering, you know.
Khudahafiz.
Stand back, the read time’s being calculated…
Some Butterflies Are Just Flies
Live*
Salam to whoever is on the other side of the glowing rectangle (brother, sister, bibi, janab, hazrat, sayyed, you basically), dear reader, you’re close to the tenth level. Wohoo. Let’s start with the ninth one.
LEVEL 9: Some Butterflies Are Just Flies.
I’m kinda proud with the title I came up with. Isn’t it so cool? Wordplay at its best.
backstage*
(Manager: Didn’t you just polish the saying ‘All that glitter is not gold’?)
Well, I did something, didn’t I? All the human inventions are just mix and match from what we already know.
Shakespeare gonna be so jealous, he might snap his quill, haha.
Anyway, remember, in some point we spoke about how when we like something in someone, we don’t stop there? We start taking it to the extreme and start adopting their other habits as well?
Even the trash ones?
Well, if we didn’t, this level is just that.
ULTIMATE can help you choose.
- The state of googoogaga.
Let’s begin. *Dramatic drumrolls.*
Number 1, The State Of Googoogaga.
There was this roast reel I watched where the guy showed the roast material, I mean, someone else’s reel first and then reacted to it.
So it was a couple at a concert. Front row-seat. Enjoying the show basically. The woman was sitting on the guy’s lap. PDA at it’s peak. Now, whoever the singer was, gets down from the stage, removes his jacket and gives it to this woman.
They. Lose. Their. Mind.
They’re ecstatic. Both the female AND the male. And the guy starts kissing his woman, happy tears falling down his face.
Did I miss something? I mean, excuse me, but did she win something?
Cut. And next comes the roast guy. He first makes a deliberate, overly exaggerated, disgusted face. Proceeds to say how the guy is so happy that his wife or partner got a sweaty, used jacket from another guy. And how unstable their mind became when they got it.
Honestly? He got a point.
They were cheering and dancing and celebrating as if their son got the MVP in the football match.
If only parents still do that.
If only kids still play outside.
Okay, putting a stop to sounding like an oldie, let’s proceed.
Hysteria. That’s the word MM used. Hysteria.
We get hysterical if that person we like only for, in this example, his voice, just looks at us once. ONCE. A tiny microsecond of attention.
A goldfish can give you more, you know?
Do you know how many BTS fan videos have come my way?
Do you know how many times I’ve winced when the fan who’s recording behind the camera, screams at the top of their voice just because they got a glance from a band member? Yeah. My ears still file complaints.
Yes, okay, you can call me an internet addict cause I’m there half my life, but hey, where else am I supposed to get super cool, super relatable examples from?
Now, next, I’m sure I spoke about this before. The making-up-scenarios with the cast of a show I liked. To the extent that I started picturing them as my friends and whatever.
Well, yes, this is embarrassing. Well, yes, we’re moving on.
But yeah. Some research has shown that people nowadays feel more connected and familiar with youtubers and influencers than their own family members.
This, is how weak and vulnerable we are. We just have to accept how pathetic humans can be in order to not be pathetic.
Cause awareness is key, after all. So much can be averted.
MM also gifted another example of how debilitated humans can be. Just to pause for a second, I should let this come to your notice the number of synonyms I looked up for the word ‘weak’, cause ‘weak’ has been overused.
Do you get what I just did? Made you get the impression that I’m super smart (even though I am) just by changing my vocab a bit. Flexing it, without being obvious. This trick is mentioned in How To Talk To Anyone by Leil Lowndes. Fascinating, right?
Check out for detailed articles.
If y’all would please.
(Staff: Here’s the link, gang.)
So yes, where were we? Right, the example. People feel confident and arrogant if they just KNOW someone who is, for example, of high status. Or wealthy. Or an expert in their field.
They’ve not achieved that by themselves.
Yet, here they are, all smug, basking in borrowed glow.
And there, you just successfully completed LEVEL 9! Congratulations! Though only in theory. The practical exams commence when life decides to bully you.
Now, what’s next? The next level of course.
Share your progress in the comments or (look below)
Ready for LEVEL 10? Yes? Before proceeding, remember the innocent people being killed.
Khudahafiz.
Stand back, the read time’s being calculated…
I’m Sorry, I Don’t Care
Live*
Salam to whoever is on the other side of the screen (brother, sister, bibi, janab, hazrat, sayyed, you basically), it’s the ten-level anniversary! Joy. Confetti. Whatever, let’s start the tenth level.
LEVEL 10: I’m Sorry, I Don’t Care.
I’m not even kidding but the drama I’m watching like right now, said a line that sits so so well with what we’ve been talking about. Okay okay, ahem, ready?
“What lies in front you, determines what the fact is. If that’s the case, we need to decide what we need to show them.”
And these words were said by the character playing the role of the head of a news company to the character that played the role of the head of the police. Why? Cause citizens were criticizing the police.
Eye-opening right?
We’re all in a circus.
And we might be the ones on stage rather than in the audience.
ULTIMATE got your back:
- Excuse me.
Let’s begin. *Dramatic drumrolls.*
Number 1, Excuse Me.
I’ve discussed this so many times with my mom, that if in the future, we do talk again, I can easily quote what her answer is going to be. I often think that whatever they portray in the entertainment media is highly exaggerated and does not depict real life at all. They like paint them as cartoon villains, when humans are actually quite…decent.
Bullying? Humans aren’t really that heartless.
Hate for a family member? I mean, squabbles, okay, but hate? That’s extreme.
Being insensitive to other people? Nah, a person cannot be that much of a jerk.
That was my naive TED Talk era.
Yes, the last one is different than the first example, cause come on, people say things without really thinking. And that can hurt others. But bullying? That crap is….crap. And it’s not stopping because some poster said no.
Well, this is what I used to think. That people aren’t really capable of pushing someone to suicide because of the way they looked, or someone can never tease someone (at least not on their face) about something that the other person is quite obviously insecure about.
Oh, how wrong I was.
A little story for you. Funny how life presents flawless examples right when you need it.
Today, I had this inter-university event in my uni, where my partner and I lost in the first round (don’t ask). All the losers, rather, lets put it as the people who didn’t qualify, were to gather in one of the classrooms, waiting for the snacks to be distributed.
And of course, we weren’t leaving without the snacks. We paid money for that competition.
So there we were, comfortable in the air conditioner, happy that we’ll be able to go home and enjoying our time playing Roblox.
Now, present there, right next to us, was another team from another university. They asked us something about the place where our uni is situated and that led to small talk. Which led us to ask them which uni they were from.
Which somehow led to something that made my partner agree with these students, that yes, our uni was indeed, horrible.
We, the students of that uni, were already roasting that very uni, in front of students from another uni! Yeah, yeah shame on us. Our loyalty? Dead. We got a smack from life right away when the other uni undergraduate said, “Yeah. Our uni is like very bad, but compared to this uni, it’s wayyyyy better.”
Excuse me?
Pardon?
What in the audacity Olympics?
What level of brazenness is this? How boorish! Never in my life can I imagine myself saying that to someone.
So basically, yes, people can be what they depict in media. And I’m not talking about the extremes that murder and commit hideous crimes. I’m talking about everyday people, who live lives similar to everyone else’s.
And here, in this point, I’d like to point out how MM praised all the women who stay firm on the right path and their hijab doesn’t sway because of what other humans think, or believe or say.
Oh, don’t you feel hot in that?
You would look so much prettier without that on.
Don’t you think forcing women to cover up is oppression?
No. I don’t. And you shouldn’t too. Why?
Cause everyday humans, can be horrible too.
And there, you just successfully completed LEVEL 10! Congratulations! Though only in theory. The practical exams are yet to commence. Start prepping, and apply these-yada yada yada.
Now, what’s next? The next level of course.
Share your progress in the comments or (look below)
Ready for LEVEL 11? Yes? Before proceeding, moisturize them arid lips.
Khudahafiz.
Stand back, the read time’s being calculated…
From Within
Live*
Salam to whoever is on the other side of the screen (brother, sister, bibi, janab, hazrat, sayyed, you basically), take a breather cause this level…..nothing, just kidding. Let’s start with the 11th level.
LEVEL 11: From Within.
I sometimes think of my friends whose husbands ask them to unfriend their guy friends on various social media platforms. Some complain. Some comply. Some ask the same for female friends in return.
And it makes me ponder, is that really necessary?
I mean, following guy friends isn’t, or shouldn’t be that much of a problem. There’s no chatting, no interacting. Just their names in the followers list.
There’s no harm in it.
And then some alternate, pure conscience voice speaks up and says in their squeaky, taunting voice,
backstage*
(Host: “Then he’ll keep the female friends too.”)
Exactly. You seem to have experience.
(Host: Nah, I never talk to another female with that intention.)
We’ll know that after I discuss it with agent sweetcheese (Host’s wife, working in the same company).
(Host: Everyone here is a witness.)
To your undying love for a sole woman or your incoming downfall?
(Host: First one. But also the fact that you haven’t shirked me away yet. My offer st-)
I was about to do that. Please leave before I call for secu-.
(Host: I was silent the entire last level. Don’t you-)
Yeah, and that’s the reason it turned out so well.
(Host: I promise I’ll make you acknowledge me.)
Did you buy the groceries sweetcheese asked you to?
(Host: Oh damn! How did you know though?)
Typical.
ULTIMATE: The path to modesty:
- Wrapper?
- Not what you think.
Let’s begin. *Dramatic drumrolls.*
Number 1, Wrapper?
Let’s talk about whatever I was already talking about in the introduction before the “host” that I certainly don’t need in my shows, interrupted us.
Relationships of males and females.
Not based on real relationships but the ones we form by observing. Situational.
Temporary.
Fleeting.
People usually say that females are responsible for getting raped. That they were the ones who invited a man to do that. That they are the ones who incite men. They are the reason, the men lost control.
That they, are the reason for whatever happened to themselves.
As if the victim caused the crime.
Even though all of this is complete crap, let’s try to see this from a different perspective. Of course, nothing ever justifies rape though.
In Islam, women are ordered to cover themselves up. That nothing except their face and hands below the wrists are visible. That hijab, should cover their curvaceous or lean body.
And people look at this as a form of oppression.
What they don’t realize that when someone’s been gifted with something, it’s but natural to hide it, conceal it, keep it away from the ones that it should be kept away from.
What a tongue twister.
Let me ask again. When something is precious, isn’t it natural to protect it? To keep it hidden from those unworthy of it?
Islam, the religion they term as the one that gives women no rights, says that a woman is a delicate flower and should be treated as such. If people researched instead of scrolling through social media propaganda, they’d see how deeply kind this religion is towards women.
And besides, if they are ordered to cover up, MEN are also ordered to not raise, their gaze.
(Staff: She’s a complete poet today.)
MEN are told not to look at their faces and their beauty and at THEM. End of story.
The rules are for both.
The people in the west, that apparently live their lives with ‘freedom’ and ‘liberation’ and the betterment and welfare of women, is the place where 90 percent of the women have been assaulted or taken advantage of.
Despite all the laws and despite all the rules.
I remember reading this once, “If someone needs laws to be good, are they really good?” And I think about this once in a while.
Why do you think, in this example, that the women over there are so vulnerable? Why are the crime and rape rates the highest over there? Isn’t it a modern, educated location? Aren’t their thoughts and beliefs way better than a religion that supposedly ‘oppresses’ its women?
The answer is clear enough.
Cause till a woman does not understand this and until she stops seeking validation through eyes that degrade her, she’s never really safe. Cause this safety and security, comes from within, as MM put it.
You objectify yourself, you will get objectified. And then you can’t crib about people putting value to you only because of your body.
Or treating you like a product.
Islam has rules for both. Women like to be seen and men like to see.
And the test is for both of them to refrain.
Number 2, Not What You Think.
Movies and media are termed as soft war cause they attack and you fall dead before even realizing that they removed their swords from their sheaths long back.
When the world wants to normalize something, they put it in films and content that is consumed, or rather, devoured by us simpletons. Specially, content meant for children.
Need examples? Well, LGBTQ and hundred other letters, sums up as one of the best explanations. Apparently, you’re not an adult till you’re 18, but you can change your gender when you’re what, 10?
Basically, you’re telling me, a kid does not have enough intelligence to vote but yet sufficient when it comes to their anatomy and how they feel about themselves?
Bruh, the only thing I did when I was that age was play pc games with adobe flash and default games like hide and seek with friends. We didn’t think about who we feel like or who we feel attracted to.
And also, a kid is not capable of both. Voting and redefining their anatomy. Well, for the latter, no one is. No one will ever be. Don’t get me started, I can talk a lot about this topic.
As we come back after completely straying and drifting away from the point, media is really powerful. One of the thing that they’ve achieved, is ruined pure love and relationships.
It’s turned love into lust, relationships into experiments.
“Oh, you can definitely just be friends with the opposite gender.”
“Oh, come on it’s just one kiss. It’s not that deep.”
“Just flirting.”
“Just this.”
“Just that.”
Nuh uh. Wake up. Cause, nuh uh.
People were asked if male and females can just be friends. All the females replied with a yes.
And all the males replied with a no.
That says a lot, doesn’t it?
And there, you just successfully completed LEVEL 11! Congratulations! Though only in theory. The practical exams are yet to commence. Prepare wisely.
Now, what’s next? The next level of course.
Share your progress in the comments or (look below)
Ready for LEVEL 12? Yes? Before proceeding, have a whole tomato.
Khudahafiz.
Stand back, the read time’s being calculated…
Such A Child
Live*
Salam to whoever is on the other side of the screen (brother, sister, bibi, janab, hazrat, sayyed, you basically), the whole squad in service of the twelve imams. Shall we begin?
LEVEL 12: Such A Child.
Even though a person is identified more through his father, it does not imply that the mother comes second. It’s always, even in Islam, that the mother has been given an unmatched position.
Not that I’m putting down fathers, mind you.
They’re the ones who take up the most responsibility, after all. The bread winners (not a very good example for today’s time, but yeah), the protectors, and as they say, the MAN of the house.
By the way, I’m holding back so much right now. Why? Cause whenever I hear the word ‘man’, my inner feminist? I don’t know, basically something, inside me awakens. Ignites.
Activates.
Society, or whoever are the twisted collective noun, has weakened men. Pampered them to the point where accountability has become a taboo. Babied them and given them too much leeway.
I don’t know how to say it, but they’ve become…womanly. Like not that I’m saying that woman do all the shit above, it’s that they’ve become fragile, delicate and emotionally paper-thin.
Like women on the other hand, when called fragile, and the above, it’s not about them being all of that in spirit. But rather, it’s like they’re too valuable. And that’s the reason they’re so…precious? Do you get it?
That’s how men have become. Except all of that not in the way women are. I don’t even know what I’m saying anymore.
Of course, not all men.
Just like not all women.
It’s not one wavelength after all. But you know, different wavelength form a good melody.
That was so random, but I wanted to just throw that there so that y’all think of me as oooo, so cool. So poetic. So deep.
Anyway. I’ll just say one thing as we come back on topic.
backstage*
(Manager: Damn, we were ready for a men vs women.)
Not today.
I told this to my mom once. It was the weekend and my mom had a holiday from work, quite obviously. It’s usually the same. I do my work. She does hers. She disturbs me. I pretend all mighty by not accepting that I’m the one who initiated it. Goaded her into it.
Classic family dynamics.
So to be succinct, it was a normal, everyday type of day.
And that means, I wasn’t particularly observing her or anything.
But at the end of the day, it was the most salient conclusion. It stood out the most.
What?
She was in the best of moods that day. We like to say “don’t let others affect your mood,” but that’s just a cute theory. The reality is that everything, affects us. We spoke about this is in the previous levels too.
So when someone is in a bad mood, and you go poke them, guess what happens to your mood?
Rhetorical question, right?
The point of exposing myself yet one more time like this, is to make you realize that my mom, because she was so happy to not work that day, bloomed in such a beautiful way, it was apparent in every corner of the house. The house breathed.
So opposite of when my mom is those scary moods, and the house echoes it instead.
Well, of course it’s not the same for every woman. Nor is it really different from the men.
I mean, who wouldn’t want a break from the tedious world?
But as far as I’ve read and my limited knowledge goes, men like the competition. They like the struggle. They like the work. The like the grind.
Of course they like the breaks too. But they’re more built for this. This tough race. These challenging situations.
They thrive in it.
NOT THAT WOMAN DON’T, mind you.
It’s just from all what I’ve heard and gathered and know, when women aren’t always challenged or they have someone to protect them, they’re gonna show their real feminine side. The calm, nurturing, radiant one.
They’re gonna shine.
And that feminine side will be such a blessing, that one look at them, and you’ll forget everything that worries you, just like Imam Ali (as) described bibi Fatema (sa), his wife, as.
You see the role of women now?
How much value they hold?
And if they’re not up to their best, you know who’s gonna get affected?
The family.
The kids.
The harmony.
ULTIMATE is the guide.
- Pal, they’re your pals too.
Let’s begin. *Dramatic drumrolls.*
Number 1, Pal, They’re Your Pals Too.
This is what the main topic is for today. A mother’s role in the upbringing of her children.
Mind you, I’m not saying it’s only the mother’s job description, it’s the father’s as well. But if you think logically and practically, keeping all the biasness and modern ideologies or whatever, aside, it’s quite obvious that the mother is more predominant over what the child’s beliefs or mindset is gonna be than the father.
I read this funny thing the other day: “Our language is called mother tongue because fathers don’t have a chance to speak.” I smirked and snorted.
Anyway, here are examples to back up these claims by MM himself. Bibi Maryam, mother of Hazrat Isa (as):
Prophet Isa is also addressed as the son of Maryam in the Quran. A prophet being addressed as such, stresses on the point on the character of the mother. Why?
Well, a prophet who is infallible and a guide for humanity, such a prestigious and important being, pure, is introduced through his mother, speaks a lot about the mother.
That’s not coincidence. That’s significance.
Now, one might argue that he didn’t have a father to be attributed with one, so cue, the second example.
In Ziyarate Ashura, we curse the son of Marjanah, who was a Persian concubine (according to Google) and was the mother of Ubaydallah. Now, this guy was already known by the name of Ibne Ziyad, that means, the son of Ziyad.
But when it came to his hideous crimes like what he did in Karbala; sending an army to fight against the family of the Holy Prophet (saws), the grandson of the prophet (saws), Imam Husayn (as), solely for the greed and desire for power, he is referred to as the son of Marjanah. Through his mother.
I think the point is clear.
Women play a major role in the upbringing of the children. They shape nations, one child at a time. And that’s the reason, we need to be so careful especially with everything going on around us and the world practically sprinting towards its own doom.
Like compare the time the child spends outside the house, taking in everything of the polluted world, and how much time is put in his upbringing when he/she is at home.
Compare the time that is spent with him/her with the time he/she spends with that rectangular piece of disaster, aka, the phone.
Who is raising the child? You? Or that black hole called an electronic device?
I believe we don’t need discuss about the phone and the effects it has on children.
And there, you just successfully completed LEVEL 12! Congratulations! Though, of course, only theory-wise. The practical exams are yet to commence. Start preparing, and apply these-yada yada yada.
Now, what’s next? The next level of course.
Share your progress in the comments or (look below)
Ready for LEVEL 13? Yes? Before proceeding, meditate. There’s too much on that brain (if there is, a brain).
Khudahafiz.
Stand back, the read time’s being calculated…
The Frog Came Back
Live*
Salam to whoever is on the other side of the screen (brother, sister, bibi, janab, hazrat, sayyed, you basically), whoever said 13 is a bad number, is bad themselves. Let’s begin.
LEVEL 13: The Frog Came Back.
Before diving in today’s madness, let’s talk a little about the process of writing these scripts.
backstage*
(Manager: What? Really?)
(Staff 1: Wait, she never agreed to behind-the-scenes before.)
(Staff 2: Is this the start of something big?)
(Host: Yes, Wacky. Is this the start of something big?)
As I was saying, ignoring the circus behind, let’s talk about the process of script-writing.
Usually after reading a book, or listening to something that shakes the brain cells awake, the notes are made or the points are marked directly in that particular source.
Then, accordingly with perfect precision and high critical thinking, chaos is filtered and this indispensable, worthy wisdom is extracted, followed by sorting it into respective levels.
Moving on, posts are made for each level with a level name, a little summary or hook, Ultimate introduction, and redirection to the caption. These are assigned solely by reading the content that has been saved / extracted / shortlisted. All this is done with the seriousness of a war strategist.
Now, for a game of Russian roulette with my sanity.
Cause then comes the writing part. Different templates are pre-made and then the script content is filled in.
Now, when I do sit down after literally threatening my lazy self, there are rare moments that occur, such as right now, where I forget what in the Allah’s galaxies was I thinking while naming the level and the Ultimate points.
I’m still confused as to why in the world is there a frog here, in these levels that speak about the purity of Islam and women and such beautiful topics.
Not that I’m saying that frogs are bad, okay?
BUT WHAT WAS I THINKING? I LITERALLY CAN’T REMEMBER.
(Manager: Oh.)
(Staff: Oh dear.)
WHY ARE YOU SILENT NOW, “MR. hOsT”? WHY DON’T YOU HELP ME FIGURE OUT WHAT THE HEL- oh wait. Wait. WAIT. I think I cracked it. Oh yessss!
(Host: How does she function in life like this? What do you think dear viewers, is she or is she not an escapee from a ment-)
You better be an escapee from this studio before I get my hands on you.
(Staff 1: I’m kind of curious. Cause actually, how and why is there a frog here. Let’s skip whatever rubbish they’re doing right not and leap right to the Ultimate!)
ULTIMATE is faster:
- The frog is here.
Let’s begin. *Dramatic drumrolls.*
Number 1, The Frog Is Here.
What could be in a day in the life of an eight year old other than pure happiness and joy? The only thing that weighed on them is deciding what to play, what to watch, and when the school will end.
When I was in this golden era, there was this one particular day where it all changed. The day that I can never forget. The day that haunts me sometimes.
We had a P.E teacher who was a pretty chill and a funny man. He used to give us the best time of our lives during our free blocks of the day and used to make sure every kid enjoyed themselves.
Though after what he did on this specific day, it changed my opinion of him completely. My perception did a backflip from a cliff.
He used to take usual rounds in the corridors if he didn’t have a class to take care of. He would stroll outside, nod to teachers teaching inside classes, and if there happened to be a class that was going wild due to the absence of the required teacher, he used to barge in with one hand raised.
Everyone used to immediately shut up and look at him with wide, innocent eyes. They’ll then look at his outstretched hand and their eyes would follow when he would start to lower it while saying, “Keep your voices?”
As soon as his hand went below his waist, every kid in the class giggled and shouted in unison, “DOWN!”
He would laugh along with the kids after, wave, put a finger on his lips as another reminder and leave.
Every child used to love and respect him, and due to these very feelings, they used to talk softly afterwards for a whole minute before their voices shot up again.
Sigh, good times.
But then, one day he came to our roaring class to do exact thing we were quite familiar with. Except, he did not leave after that. He laughed but then proceeded to sit in the teacher’s chair.
“Would y’all like to listen to a story?” He asked to a bunch of story-hungry children. Everyone shouted their yesses.
“There was once a renowned chef, who used to make rat curry.”
“Ewww!” Everyone exclaimed. But it was the type of crap kids liked, so we were invested with everything we had.
“Do y’all want to know his special recipe?”
“NO!” Shouts and laughs. Who in their right minds would like rat curry? But our P.E teacher continued anyway.
“You have to first take a rat, hold it by its tail, give it a smile and then put it in a pan with water. Then you start the fire and let him boil. And then you get him out of his bath and remove his heart and eat it!” Everyone showed their disgust and shock at the ridiculous and messed up story.
But there was fascination too.
Cause now that I think about it, it wasn’t messed up at all.
Staff, if you would please-
Number 1.5, The Frog Is Here, pt.2.
That story was the talk for the rest of the day. Over the years, I came across the phrase, ‘Boiling the frog.’ and I couldn’t help but think of this story.
We’re not going to be talking about the idiom ‘Boil the Frog’, but shed some light on another perspective.
You see MM spoke about this in his lecture: Influencers(we were talking about them before rodents and amphibians came into the picture) are not very blunt. They’re not to the point but like creating drama and use roundabout methods.
They try to warm up to you. They warm you up.
I mean, it’s obvious. Cause then they’ll be bland and mundane and like everyday people. So, why would other everyday people waste their time on them if these influencers didn’t possess a cinematic filter?
The fact that simple people were so obsessed with these influencers was because in some way, these online sensations made their boring lives, a bit interesting.
So yes, these ‘trend-makers’ tried their best to be everything but boring. If they were, you wouldn’t take them so seriously. You would think, ‘Well what are they doing different than others than I should give them my time?’ leading you to feel negatively about them.
But if they have your attention, day after day after day, your soul is gonna consume what they feed you, glamorizing it and making it fun like “Here comes the airplane!”, to the point where they don’t feel like a stranger but someone who understands you.
Someone who knows how you feel.
Someone, who resonates with your beliefs.
Slowly, warmly, yours.
And you won’t even realize that it’s not them resonating with your beliefs, it’s you resonating with theirs.
You see what’s happening? You see where the rat and the frog came from?
If you put the frog and the rat directly in the boiling water, they’re gonna jump out and try to escape. But if you put them in cool, comfortable water, water they’re familiar with, they won’t resist. They’ll sit, be patient. See what you have for them.
Then comes the flame. Bit by bit by bit.
But they don’t feel it. The only thing they’re going to notice is the smile you’re giving them from above.
The flame will change the water, their bodies will adapt to it, they won’t realize a thing, until the body’s limit will be reached and it starts deteriorating.
It will hit the frog or the rat or a human too late of what happened. Of how the changing water, changed them and their beliefs and their personality, and they were oblivious to it till the end.
Boiled to the core.
Their hearts, eaten.
And there, you just successfully completed LEVEL 13! Congratulations! Though only in theory. The practical exams are yet to commence. Start preparing, and apply these-yada yada yada.
Now, what’s next? The next level of course.
Share your progress in the comments or (look below)
Ready for LEVEL 14? Yes? Before proceeding, learn a card trick.
Khudahafiz.
Author: Wacky
Drop in and say hello!
